Sunday, October 19, 2014

Patience Being Tested Like Never Before

How's potty training going, you ask? Well six days after we started, things are going okay. Not great, but slowly progressing.

The first day was Tuesday, and it was a hard day. I set a timer every 20 minutes and took her to the potty to see if she had to go, and was not successful AT ALL. She would sit on her cute little princess potty for 15-20 minutes, with me doing anything and everything I could to get her to stay there happily. Then the second we walked out to the living room, she would have an accident. It was infuriating, but I had to keep a sweet smile on my face and pretend that everything was okay, so she wouldn't get upset or anxious. We had one very small success that day, but a LOT of accidents as well.

The second day, Wednesday, was hands down the worst day. She had accident after accident, and I literally spent my entire day cleaning up pee, getting peed on, changing clothes, and trying to keep Rubes from soiled areas while I was cleaning up Scar.  She didn't want to go, and would cry if I had to take her to the restroom, even though I knew she had to go. I don't think I have ever had a bigger test of my patience. EVER. I just wanted to scream, because NOTHING I was doing seemed to help or to work. I asked some family and friends for advice, and most of them just said super vague and unhelpful things like, "We would take her to go, and she just went" or "So and so was super easy, we trained her in two days and we've never had an accident yet" or "We didn't even try, she just put on underwear one day, and then we never looked back." While this must have been a wonderful scenario for them, it definitely did not apply to me and my kid, and truthfully was even more exhausting and frustrating to hear. I'm not sure if it was just jealousy, or me just assuming all of those people were trying to pretend it was easier than it was, but I was not in a good frame of mind by the end of the day. She only made it to the potty twice, and we had SO MANY accidents, it was exhausting and making me feel like I was failing my little girl in some way, by not doing things better. 

I thought about giving up, and just trying again in a few weeks when she was more ready, but I told myself to try it for one more day. I didn't want to push her too much if she really wasn't ready, but I also didn't want to give up early because I was frustrated. The next day went much better though. She was much more excited about the potty (I think because she had finally had some small success the night before) and did great. We only had one accident and she was happy to go to the potty. Since then it has gotten a little bit better, and we are now working on letting her tell us when she has to go. We definitely are still asking her a lot if she needs to go, but not taking her in there as often. 

I'm glad we stuck with it, but it was SO MUCH harder than I was prepared for. People don't really tell you that your kid is going to pee. A lot. Everywhere. Or that getting them to sit on the toilet is like herding cats. So I think the point of this post is for mamas that are having a hard time with potty training, or who are thinking about training. This isn't meant to scare anyone, but just meant to give an alternative to all of the "my kid trained in one day, he hated being dirty" stories, and to express some solidarity for those of you going through the same struggle. 

This isn't going to last forever. One day our little ones will be potty trained, and no longer have a house and clothes covered in pee. They'll get it. I just have to remind myself that she is trying very hard, and doing what she can with something that is new and scary. And although it has pushed my patience to the very end, it is important for me to relax and help her through this, because we will both get through this. 

How did potty training go for you? It's okay to tell me that it only took you one day, even though I'll be a little jealous! Were you able to stay calm and patient? 

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